Halfway Mark

Here's a before photo I found of myself today....



This was taken after the St Bernard's Christmas Talent show in late December 2011...just 5 months ago...

Here's a photo of me today (5/23/12)...




If I didn't notice changes before, I definitely do today.

As of yesterday (5/22/12) I have lost 51.4 pounds total. I'm proud of that.

And stumbling upon that December photo of myself today really hit home in a new way in regards to what it is I'm doing.

It can't just be a fad...or a phase...or a stage of my life...it has to be the rest of my life. I'm nervous that I won't stick with it...I'm nervous that I'll cave and have moments of weakness that take me back to where I was in December.

I don't want that...

I don't want that more than anything.

I cried when I saw that photo of me today. I mean, that was just 5 months ago..ya know...5 measly months...and God knows how long I was there too...miserable about what I was...embarrassed to be looked at...defeated because things were just too hard.

And now, almost 90 days into my new lifestyle, there's light...it's still a long way away, but I'm starting to be able to see it.

My 6 year old nephew weighs 47lbs the last time he went to the doctor...I've lost more than what my nephew (a complete person) weighs...

I'm proud of that.

And I'm excited to keep going.

I have a lot of motivation within myself to keep going...to really see things through...my aim when I started was to get healthy...but I was also targeting the 100 number...

100 pounds off me...and mostly it in this year of I can manage. My birthday is in the end of November...my goal is to be down 80 pounds by then...that's what I'm aiming for. After that, it gives me until the following February 28th (my 1 year date) to lose another 20 totaling my big 100 pound loss.

Sounds like a big goal...but...I'm at the halfway mark already! 51.4 pounds lost!!!

And I'm gonna work hard to be sure they don't get found ever again!!!

I appreciate all of your support and encouragement in my journey...it really really does help.

Till next time...
-M-

I'm Gonna Win

I've become a gym rat of sorts!! I love going! I love getting all hot and sweaty! I love know that my time spent there doing the things I do are increasing my health-o-meter!!! That's a really great feeling!
Yesterday, the St Bernard's employee newsletter came out...and guess who's in 2nd place or the most total percentage weight loss in the Summer Slim Down competition!!! Me!!! That's right!! I was really surprised to see it this second round posting as I was 13th in the first round! But I'm really happy!! And to top it off, the person who is in 1st is only .44% ahead of me!! We have about 3 weeks left in the competition and I'm determined!!
So...where am I at to date?!
So far, I've lost 45 pounds!!! (as of last week...i wont weigh again for another week)...Which I can't hardly believe most days. Who would've thought that I would be able to say that?! I certainly never did!!
Not many people comment that they notice a difference in me though, which either means I just have so much to lose that it's gonna take a significant amount of lose for others to notice,...or people don't really want to say "OMG you've lost so much weight!!" maybe for fear of hurting my feelings for bringing up anything having to do with weight?? I don't know....
I do know though that I can tell a difference....I can tell in how my clothes are fitting...I mean, I'm literally losing my pants right an left!!! I can tell in my muscles, as in, I can actually feel muscles moving if I flex!! Haha!! I mean, I've always felt strong, and solid, I've always felt 'athletic'...now though, my body is becoming 'athletic'! And I love it!! I can see a difference in my waist and back and arms and legs...visual changes... :D I'm no where where I'd like to be, but I'm 45 pounds closer!!!
Anyway, I don't know what the next 3 weeks will include for me...I don't know how much more I'll lose or if I'll be able to break away to 1st place...but I know this much, I'm gonna literally work my ass off!